i’m just back in the studio. not much work taking place so far, just a whole lotta cleaning up. and while cleaning, i’ve been thinking about 2012 might bring. it feels quite different to other years – for a good reason.
in 2011, we were lucky – raph’s business’s have been successful, and it’s changed our life quite a bit. after 10 years of my business being the main supporter of our family, we now had another income. it initally came as quite a shock to me. up until recently, our working lives were pretty much based around me being able to do my work. of course, none of it would have happened without raph, who ran all the business goings-on, but who also diligently picked up the kids most days, did the supermarket runs, and was generally there at my beck and call whenever i needed him. i was one spoilt (but very hard working) lady.
but now, this can no longer be the case – unfortunately successful hospitality business’s do not cater for the beck and call of a spoilt wifey. at first, i tried cracking a pretty good princess tantrum for about, ohhh… 6 months. but it didn’t get me anywhere. i also had a good shot at being super-mum, trying to handle much more of the domestic duties, and working insane hours to compensate. but that just made me even more grumpy.
so after many discussion’s about how we can make this new situation work, raph put this to me: “you have worked your ass off for 15 years, and now this is your opportunity work less and just do the things you want to do”. at first, i was outraged. and silent. hard work is my thing – i love it, how could i stop doing what i do? but after a few weeks of consideration, i’m almost at peace with this idea. i’m even starting to like it.
i’ve relaised it doesn’t mean i will no longer be working hard, it does mean i can put more energy into the projects i really believe in, rather than saying yes to everything that comes my way because we need the money to pay our mortgage (yes, up until now i’ve still been working on things i didn’t love because basically we have needed the cash). what an insanely privileged situation i could potentially be in.
i’m so used to working the other way it actually feels a bit wrong, so to convince myself, here are some positive things that this new way of working will hopefully achieve in 2012 for me (resolutions of sorts i guess):
quality not quantity: as i said above – spending more time on the projects i’m really into, and creating for those projects the best work i can possibly deliver. this will also mean i might have to find “no” in my vocabulary from time to time. uh-oh.
more time with my kids: although i don’t do too badly in this department at the mo’, i really want hang with ari as much as i can before he starts school in 2013.
becoming a domestic goddess: our house up until now has generally been pure chaos, but shit under my house rule is going to be ORGANISED, and TIDY. i’m talking dinner menu’s planned 2 weeks in advance, grocery shopping being done online and delivered, a list of chores for each child to be completed every night and a pantry full of neat rows of labelled jars. and that’s just this week.
getting my license: yes, at the ripe old age of 38, i’m a loser who still does not drive. i’m actually quite happy not driving, but it does make getting 2 kids around sort of tricky. i have been taking intermittent lessons for 2 years now, and doing ok (except for parking. i suck at parking), but there is something in me that is just terrified of taking the test. i’m going to get hypnosis or anything else possible (suggestions?) to get over it and start driving for real. and i’m writing it on here for all your public eyes to read so it becomes a proper commitment out there in the world.
more things for me: more gardening, more bike-riding, more opp-shopping, more getting fit (with this life-changing lady), more time-wasting time on the internet, more reading books, more long lunches with wine, more trips to the library, more watching dvd’s, more sleeping. all the things i have struggled to find time to do before, i’m going to do more of now.
so there it is, my life laid bare for 2012. it all seems so positive and indulgent right now, but i guess everything could still go belly up and i’ll be back to slaving my nights away (which you know, i don’t actually mind every now and again). ah the joys of a husband and wife both being self-employed (and crazy).
what’s up for you guys in 2012?